My Month of Being Intentional is actually over. I don’t want to quit writing about this subject because it’s kind of a life goal for me now: To be more intentional in my well, everything! So, my Month of Being Intentional posts will continue maybe under a slightly different title. Okay, back to the post……….
I know, I know. I’m stealing Nike’s famous logo. Nike knew what they were doing, though. People have been borrowing this famous phrase for years. But hey, when it’s all said and done, all the to-do lists and well meaning wishes don’t mean a thing if you don’t Just Do It. Am I right?
I’m not writing about getting things done today, though. I’m actually writing about friendships. Women friendships.
By the way, I googled Women Frienships and most of the pictures looked something like this:
I guess these scenarios don’t apply to us more mature women, with a family, or busy (sometimes overwhelming) lives, jobs, ministries and whatnot.
I thought it would be easier making friends and maintaining friendships as I’ve gotten older; but it’s actually harder.
Before I delve into this topic and where I’m coming from, you have to know this about me: I’m not an introvert. I have this ability to talk, to just about anyone. I could talk to a fence post for half an hour. It’s a blessing and a curse! In fact, when there is a lull in conversation (with actual people, not a fence post), you can count on me to fill the silence. Not always with anything worthwhile, mind you.
I love meeting new people and really enjoy making new friends; I also like the comfort and safety net of my peeps, the people I’ve known forever. I’m not a wall flower. I love to get in there and mingle; but I’m not the life of the party either. I don’t need to be the center of attention. Being with people kind of energizes me. Yet, I don’t mind spending the weekend at home or spending my nights tapping away at the computer, being holed up in my house for a couple of days. I won’t plan the party; but I will sure come and keep the conversation going.
So, even though I’m a pretty outgoing person and am blessed to have some very special friends, I find it challenging sometimes to have that quality time with friends that I used to. I have found myself being a little more apprehensive when it comes to making new friends. I’ve been feeling not so confident.
Nowadays my circle of friends are so busy. We have young, needy families and husbands with busy jobs. Some of us moms have busy jobs. Some of us moms home school. Some of us have toddler…….boys…….enough said. Some of us have sick parents, who are getting older. Our days are exhausting. I know. Sometimes, it’s just hard to step out and to make a new friend or to keep that old friendship going. We can feel vulnerable. We can feel like it’s just too much work. We start to say to ourselves, “Maybe, they just don’t need another friend.” Maybe we feel like we’re putting more into a relationship than we are getting out of it. Maybe, we are just having a hard time connecting.
Remember when making friends was as easy as this……….
I’ve made two new friends recently. Both scenarios took me stepping out of my comfort zone. The first friend, I initiated a get together. Putting yourself out there isn’t always easy or comfortable. I’m so glad I did, though. We had such a great time. Our kids had a great time. I’m looking forward to getting to know her better. Circumstances put the second friend and I together. We had a chance to sit, drink coffee and get to know each other better. (I knew her a little bit already.) She is such an interesting person! I know we will get together again and have coffee soon. I can’t wait.
All I’m saying is, “Just do it, mamas. ” Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and make a new friend. You are someone worth knowing. Friendships take time and effort; but they are so worth it. You may feel like your friendship plate is full; but your friendship may be what someone else needs. Your friendship plate may feel a bit empty. Even more of a reason to Just Do It.