The Comparison Game. It’s a game you really can’t win; but I’ve been guilty of playing it a time or two. This is kind of a personal post; but I hope it encourages you to make decisions that are best for you and your family.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the comparison game. It’s very tempting to look at what others are doing and what other’s have and then not be satisfied with the situation God has for your life. I’ve been there.
Here’s the thing: Every family, every situation is so different. God has called each of us in such unique and different ways that it’s just plain silly to compare. In fact, it can lead to great discontent and it can lead to missing all the good that is right in front of us.
So, I’m sharing just a handful of the Best Yesses for our family in hopes that you’ll see how different (and at the same time how alike ) our lives can be. But I want you to see how it’s like comparing apples to oranges. You can’t and you shouldn’t.
Our Family’s Best Yes::
#1 We have one car. I never ever thought in a bazillion years that we could live with one car. In fact I can be quoted saying, “We could never live without two cars.” Is it ideal? Nope. Do I love not being able to do some things because I have no car to get there? Umm…. no. Is it inconvenient? At times, yes.
Here is the positive. It has made me stay home more, which was something I needed to do. (You’ll see why in #2.) It is saving us money that is being used for other more important things right now. It has made me redefine the word “need” in my life. These are all good things. Having one car may not work for your family; but it works for ours.
#2 We home school. If you want to read about our very unexpected journey into homeschooling you can read about it here. (This is on my previous blog, Sock Monkey Tales.) I won’t lie. There have been times when I thought my life would be so much easier if I sent my kids to school each day. As a former elementary teacher, I think school is a fabulous place. For us, right now, homeschooling is best. It’s best for reasons that outweigh the doubts I have on those hard days. Many of you may have no desire whatsoever to home school. It would not be a good fit for your family; but it is for ours.
#3 I embrace our not normal schedule. With the shift The Hubs currently has, we have a completely backwards schedule. Think of a normal Monday through Friday, 8-5 schedule and he has the exact opposite! I’ve learned to embrace it. Our weekend is usually a Tuesday or Wednesday. We can’t change it; so we’ve chosen to make it work for us. In this case, we did not choose the schedule; but we chose the attitude.
#4 I don’t commit to many weekly things or much at all. Unless our family can do it together, I try not to say yes to too many things that require me to be available every single week. Making this decision affects our whole family. I’ve been in that place where I have committed to too much and it takes my time away from my most important job, Holding Down The Fort. (As my dad we would say.) For example, I teach Sunday School once a month. Right now, monthly is my commitment level! Even with all that effort we still seem to be pretty busy!
#5 I try to serve others out of my own home. Trying to limit my outside commitments and not having a second car, forces me to be a little creative. So, I try to be available by having others over to my house. I am not the Hostess with the Mostess by any means and I’m not entertaining every weekend. For example I will host co-op activities at my house or I’ll try to have friends over for coffee.
Some of the things I’ve listed are challenging and some are just different. But these choices we’ve made are what best suits our family and our unique situation. I cannot compare my normal to someone else’s normal. It won’t measure up. And if I feel that my life is lacking because it doesn’t measure up, I will always be discontent. Bitterness will seep in and take root. That is definitely not a Best Yes for me!
What are your Best Yes choices ?