Baby Step #5: Nix Negative Thoughts

Before I jump into today’s step I wanted to say two things: First, I almost glossed over this one. I loved to journal and write out my thoughts; but I also just want to get my house under control, clean and decluttered….badly.

The thought of taking a whole step to write out positive thoughts seemed a waste. I am determined to follow the steps and build these habits slowly, though. So, I did the step. I’m glad I did.

Second, it’s been a doozy of a week here in Northern California. Currently our state is on fire (and Oregon, too). We were without power for a day. It was 111 degrees one day and then dropped about 30 degrees two days later. We also have so much smoke in the air that our air quality number was at 266. 301 is considered hazardous. Let’s not forget our orange apocalyptic sky. So, I’ve been a little off in my baby steps. Gee….I wonder why??????

This is my neighborhood at 8:30 in the morning.

I’m ready to get back to it. I’m not giving up!

NIX NEGATIVE THOUGHTS.

If you are anything like me, you’ve tried several systems and planners to keep your house in order and yet your house is still not in order. Or at least for me, my house is not where it needs to be. My house is much better than it used to be and I’ll talk about that in a bit; but I’m lacking in routines big time.

I do know what it feels like to try and try and to fail and fail. So today, I’m listening to the negative thoughts that are telling me, “You are just going to fail again,” and I’m replacing them with these positive thoughts:

  • Don’t give up.
  • Slow and Steady. Build those routines little by little.
  • My goal is to make my home a place of peace, not perfection. Clutter does not make me feel peaceful. I don’t need more stuff.
  • Having a well run home will bless my family and others.
  • I can do this!

I just wrote this on a piece of paper and I’m going to put it into my control journal. This took me literally 2 minutes. I may add to it later.

A few years back I did a major declutter and though spots in my home have once again become cluttered; it’s never reached the level it used to be. That’s a win.

This summer we decluttered the room in our house that was the bane of my existence- the garage. This is a huge win!!! It has made such a difference. We have a few pieces of odds and ends to discard; but if I can tackle my garage, I can tackle anything.

A couple of weeks I ago I cleaned the kid’s bathroom. It was bad, friends. So very bad. I had not cleaned that toilet in so long, I honestly can’t tell you. It’s embarrassing. I knew then and there, I needed a cleaning routine and one I could stick to. That’s one of the many reasons I AM NOT QUITTING with the baby steps.

Chapters 4 & 5 in the Fly Lady’s book, Sink Reflections, she talks about taking care of ourselves (not running on empty) and our attitudes towards our home. These were excellent chapters.

Baby Step #4: Sticky Notes

TWO WORDS: STICKY NOTES

This is the beginning of the Control Journal. I think that’s kind of a funny name. Do you? You could call it whatever you want. There are many versions of the Control Journal out there. Just look on You Tube. Search Fly Lady Control Journal. Don’t do it right now, though. You’ll get side-tracked.

I did a little You Tube browsing this morning while my daughter watered our neighbor’s plants and I kept her company. I gave myself a time limit so I wouldn’t get lost down the dark hole of the internet.

Just hop on the Fly Lady’s website and check out hers. Or, you can use hers and tweak it to fit your style. That’s what I plan on doing.

Today, I’m making two sticky notes: One labeled Morning Routine and one labeled Night Routine. This is what I have so far on each; but these may not be the final routines. I’ll work on them this week.

Eventually this will go in some kind of binder; but for now I’m just using sticky notes.

Today’s Recap:

  • I emptied the dishwasher and there were a few dishes in the sink from the night before so I made sure to load the dishwasher and my sink was shiny.
  • I got dressed down to the flip flops. It’s 107 here today and so I did not wear shoes the rest of the day because I have no AC. I would die if I wore shoes. I’ve already explained that I hate having hot feet.
  • I began brainstorming my morning and evening routines:

MORNING ROUTINE:

  • Some Quiet Time/Morning Reading/Devotion w/Coffee
  • 1 minute Yoga
  • Get Ready
  • Start Laundry

EVENING ROUTINE: (After Dinner)

  • Shine Sink
  • Sweep
  • Living room pickup
  • Fold and put laundry away
  • Check tomorrow’s calendar

Baby Step #3 Be Consistent

I thought I would do my recap first today.

Let’s Recap:

  • My sink is still shiny. Yay!
  • I got dressed to my shoes. This is easy because I went to church. I still stand by my not wearing shoes in the house.
  • I wrote Steps 1 and 2 on a sticky and stuck it on my bathroom mirror.

So, if you log on to The Fly Lady’s website or have read her book, she teaches about morning routines, afternoon routines, evening routines and THE CONTROL JOURNAL. Today’s step is to log on and take a look around the website. It has a lot of great information. If you don’t have time, maybe pick another day. You will definitely get lost down rabbit holes. I think it is important to get the whole picture of what her Fly Lady’s system is. Her book is really helpful, too.

One thing I want to talk about today is being Consistent. I’m technically not adding steps today; but that’s okay. It’s easier to be consistent with small attainable steps or build habits little by little than having the mentality of “go big or go home”. I’ve done that too many times and it never works.

I’m going for slow and steady.

Have you read Atomic Habits by James Clear ? This was such a good book and really backs up the concept of slow, small, consistent steps for lasting change.

Doesn’t that sound fabulous???

In case you missed the first Baby Steps. Start Here:

Baby Step #2 Get Dressed To Your Shoes

So, today’s habit was really easy and you may already do this. I do this MOST days; but what made the difference for me was getting up, taking my shower right away, and getting dressed BEFORE breakfast.

I’ve been lazy all summer and now that school has started up again, I’m having to get up earlier. I’ll be honest. Getting up earlier kicked my butt this week. Starting home school kicked my butt! I was just plum tuckered by Saturday.

Here’s me dressed to shoes. I didn’t take a pic of my outfit; but trust me. I was dressed.

BTW, these Sketchers from Costco are so darn comfortable. They are my favorite.

You can read all about the mindset magic of wearing your shoes first thing in the morning from The Fly Lady herself here.

I’ll be honest, though. I hate wearing shoes in the house. It’s been 102 degrees plus this weekend and we don’t have AC. Wearing shoes in the house makes me so hot. So most days I will not wear shoes in my house, just being genuine. I do think there is merit to it, though.

For me, like I said above, the habit I’m working on is getting up earlier, getting showered and dressed to my slippers or flip flops first thing in the morning. After coffee, of course.

DAY TWO RECAP:

  • Sink is still shiny.
  • Got dressed to the shoes.

2 Steps Down. 29 To Go.

I’m posting Step #2 today, which is Sunday. I wrote the post yesterday, and think that is how I’ll proceed. I’ll work on a step and write about it; but I’ll post it the following day. Sound good? Good.

Baby Step #1: Shine Your Sink

Today I shined my sink. I mean I really got in there and cleaned it.

My house is old. As in built in the 1960’s old.

It was a rental for all that time before we bought it 4 years ago. The sink is old and porcelain. It’s cracked and chipping; and it’s seen better days.

I scrubbed that bad boy and did the best I could.

The Fly Lady is right. There is something about a clean sink. I thought ahead and emptied the dishwasher so that after I cleaned the sink, there would be no reason for dirty dishes to sit in my sparkling sink.

You guessed it. Two minutes after I scrubbed and sprayed and scrubbed some more, someone sneakily left a dish in the sink. It didn’t stay there long, though.

It felt good taking the first step. It’s an old sink, so I didn’t get every stain and scuff. It looks a million times better and I’m ready for Baby Step Two.

How I cleaned my sink:

1.) Wiped it out with soapy sponge.

2.) Sprinkled baking soda all over and spritzed with cleaner (vinegar and water).

3.) I scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed. Then I scrubbed some more.

4.) I rinsed out the baking soda, sprayed with vinegar/water, and scrubbed again. Rinse.

5.) I got out my magic eraser and got at those tough spots. Rinsed and dried with a paper towel.

Here are my before and after pictures.

You can read in more detail about how and why to shine your sink on her website here.

If you missed my intro posts to why I’m describing cleaning my sink, you can read those here and here.

See you tomorow!

SPECIAL NOTE: I’m posting this on Sunday. I actually shined my sink on Friday and tried with all my might to post on Saturday. WordPress had other ideas and would not upload my pictures. Grrrr!!!!! (That’s the sound I make when I’m frustrated.) My post is up now and it’s all good. I’m posting Baby Step #2 today as well because I did that step yesterday. Ahh….. technology. We just do the best we can, right?

Let’s Get Started:: Baby Steps

In my last post here, September is the new January, I talked about why I’m posting and sharing about getting my house in order and what that means.

Before I set out some main goals for this journey, I will share what my goals are NOT:

MY GOAL IS NOT:

A house that is always spic and span, eat off the floor clean.

I do not enjoy cleaning; but I really love it when the house is clean or looks picked up. I absolutely do not want to spend big chunks of my day cleaning. Nope. No sireee. No thank you. Also, we are home alllll day. I have two kids and two dogs. Perfectly clean is not even an option here.

Perfection.

This is a hard one for me. This, I believe, is one of the reasons I’ve failed at keeping things up before.

Making my goals too big or complicated.

Simple. Baby Steps. Routines that will stick.

MY GOAL IS TO:

To be honest and genuine on this blog.

So, get ready. You might be grossed out or have a different view of me if you know me in real life.

Make and keep good habits that will help my life and home run more smoothly and give me more time for the things that are really important.

This is totally a peace of mind thing more than it is physical thing.

Declutter and Simplify.

I don’t know about you; but this crazy year has completely overwhelmed and overstimulated my mind. My house has these pockets of clutter and when I see them, it adds to the overwhelm I already feel.

Accomplish goals and projects

This is probably my biggest reason for a (re) Start of my getting my home in order. I’m sure I’ll talk more about this in future blog posts.

Baby Steps

I’ve been reading and rereading a lot of resources, some inspirational blogs, IG accounts and books to get me motivated. I’ll share those along the way. What I’m doing this month is the Fly Lady’s Baby Steps. It’s simple and I did this years ago; so I’m familiar with it.

I know there is not a “one size fits all” system. I’m sure as I read and get inspiration from others along the way, it will all meld into my own unique way that will work for me, my season of life and my family.

Why the blog? Really to keep myself accountable. There is not a plethora of people who read my blog and that’s okay . It’s a space where I can record my progress along the way.

31 Days of Baby Steps

First of all, I wanted to post day #1 of this journey on September 1st. That didn’t happen obviously and Perfectionist Jen started thinking about postponing this till October 1st (and October has 31 days-perfect!!) I’m fighting my perfectionist tendencies so I am starting tomorrow.

I would love to post everyday documenting my progress and I will try my best but……….. real life.

I will post imperfect posts and pictures that may not look great (or they will look awesome if I have time to edit); but the goal here is not perfection.

Baby Step #1 Shine your sink.

I’ll tell you how I did in the next post here

If you have no flipping idea who The Fly Lady is, here are some links:

Fly Lady’s Sink Reflections

The Fly Lady’s Website

Let’s Start Over: September is the new January

It all started in January. My word for the year was START. (You can read that post here.) I’m laughing while typing this because just two months after the year began our world STOPPED. It stopped like “came to standstill”, “came to screeching halt”, “ran into a brick wall” kind of stop.

It’s been quite a year and honestly, keeps getting more interesting; but not in a good way.

So while life has definitely not gone back to normal, it turns out I picked the right word after all because this mama is rebooting.

I need to get back to a normal routine even if life isn’t normal.

While my house is not a disaster and stays pretty clean, I really desire to declutter and simplify.

I’m really, really tired of setting goals and almost never meeting them. *Sigh*

Basically, I need to get my house in order (and me!).

This is not about PERFECTION! Oh, heavens no. For me, this is about routines, new habits, peace in my home and peace of mind.

While 2020 has been a virus wielding, mask wearing, murder hornet threatening, riot frenzied, smoke filled (That’s just for us, NORCAL), thunderbolts, political mess of a year, God has taught me some really hard and important lessons. I’m taking that into my new year.

I’m staring over. I’m rebooting. I’m inviting you on my journey.

It’s time to (re)START.

Follow me on my journey. Start Here.

Just 94 Days to Go!

Note: This post was written on June 4, 2011

** This was 25 days before I actually had Henry. I had no idea the crazy ride we were about to embark on. I’ve copied and pasted exactly was I wrote (on my previous blog) and haven’t changed a thing. You can see my old blog here if you like Sock Monkey Tales.

June 4, 2011

Just 94 days to go! That’s when Bauer Boy should make his grand entrance. (That’s what I have to call him since Andy and I are no where close to agreeing on a name.) I can’t believe I’m down to mere weeks. 13 1/2 to be exact.

This also means 94 days to be on the couch. I’m still in a bit of shock to be quite honest. One day I’m in my classroom packing things up and sorting papers, thinking of all my summer plans that I’m about to embark on. Next day, I find myself at Kaiser lying in a hospital bed only being able to get up to use the bathroom.

Because of the placenta previa I have and the fact that I started bleeding (And I just have to say, it didn’t seem like that much to me. But according to the doctor it was enough) I am now on bed rest for the next 94 days.

94 days seems like forever.

I will be very honest, I really haven’t been able to see the silver lining in this. I’ve been….blue.

Pity Party for one, calling Pity Party for one!

First of all, I am SO THANKFUL that Bauer Boy is fine. He’s moving and kicking and looks great. When I get to feeling sorry for myself or mad that I can’t do the things I was looking forward to doing, I remind myself (as the doctor did) that I don’t want to have a baby at 26 weeks. He’s still safe inside, cooking away, as he should be.

It was all the things I was looking forward to doing, especially with Lily. Our family vacation and trip to see my sister in Colorado… cancelled. Going to the library and working in the garden with Lily…. cancelled. I could go on, but I won’t. I have to look at the bright side or this will be one sad summer.

Be at rest once more, oh my soul, for the Lord has been good to you. Psalm 116:7 This verse has been comforting to me. The Lord has been good. I have lots and family and friends around to help. Andy, who up until now has worked graveyard shifts, is on the day shift for the next month. How awesome is that?? I won’t be alone at nights. No dishes to do or cleaning the bathroom. All I have to do is fold the laundry, not put it away (which was the part I hated doing).

It’s just 94 days, right? A drop in the bucket in the big scheme of things.

Things don’t “just happen”. And I know that. God has a reason and something to teach me and the people around me.

Ten Quarantine Lifesavers

Call it what you will, Shelter in Place, Quarantine, Lockdown. We are stuck at home. Well, if you live in California, you are still supposed to be sheltering at home.

It’s been seven weeks. Seven weeks! Yup, that’s 49 days. Good for you doing the math.

Here are 10 things that are getting me through this abnormal, faith testing, bizarro time in our history.

1.) Memes. I’ve always been a big fan of the meme. Now, more than ever, the clever humor of memes bring daily laughter into my life. We need to laugh, people; or we will go insane. Memes that give a snarky jab of truth are even better.

Here’s some of my faves. This is just the tip of the meme iceberg, though. If you follow me on Instagram @theaccidentaldomestic and watch my instastories, you’ll see all my favorites.

2. SGN (Some Good News) is a weekly You Tube “news show” hosted by John Krasinski. So, I’m going to watch Jim Halpert in anything he’s in. If you don’t know who he is, we obviously aren’t friends. (The Hubs and I have watched The Office so many times we’ve lost count.) Anyway, the reason I love this show is that John highlights real people doing real things to spread good news and kindness around the world during this time. He has celebrity friends come on each week to help him celebrate and honor the people on the front lines and the next door neighbor who’s being kind and making a differnece.

I cry every single week.

Here is the episode of SGN where John arranges for nurses in Boston to have a private trip to Fenway Park. He enlists the Red Sox and a special video visit from Big Papi who gives everyone at the hospital free baseball tickets FOR LIFE. Grab your tissues.

3.) The Holderness Family is hilarious and hit it out of the park every time. Before the pandemic hit, I was enjoying their videos. Can I just say, since this craziness all started, the videos have gotten better and funnier. They get us. They just do.

I can’t pick a favorite video; but here’s a good one. Enjoy.

4.) Homemade Dole Whip. Disney has been releasing recipes of some of their favorite park treats. If you are a Disney fan, you understand why this is a big deal. If not, you’ll still enjoy this easy; but delicious recipe:

I big scoop of vanilla icecream, 2 cups of frozen pineapple chunks, 4 oz. of pineapple juice, and blend.

My friend, Christine, and I eating actual Dole Whip. Our fave!

You’re welcome.

5.) Zoom Calls. Who would have ever thought that 2 months ago social distancing and Zoom Meetings would become a normal part of our vernacular? Here are some really neat ways that Zoom Calls have helped us stay connected with family and friends. For this, I’m truly thankful.

Birthday family zooms and Mimi reading to H at night.

Zoom Family Trivia Night has been a great way to connect. All across the country, each week, we gathered and answered trivia questions. Our cousin, John, organized it all and it was so fun. We laughed and we got to visit with one another. Andy and I won the tournament; but I’m not here to brag.

6.) Curbside Pick – Up. We are still trying to patron our local eateries so they don’t go out of business during this time. Also, I’m sick and tired of cooking. So, it’s a Win-Win. My all-time favorite shop The Sunny Side Cottage is posting things on-line. I can call, order and pick up my merch.

7.) Drives. We can’t get out and do anything; (Though, I’m praying this changes very soon.) but taking drives through our beautiful Sonoma County countryside reminds me that there is life beyond my four walls. I know it doesn’t seem like it right now; but we will get back to it!

8.) Doing Lives with Lily. Lily and I have been doing really fun DIY Lives this past month. We’ve been posting them to my Accidental Domestic Facebook page each week. It’s given us something else to focus on and look forward to. Hopefully it’s been a bright spot for others. We have had fun doing it together.

Here’s our latest LIVE.

9.) Gardening. My garden always brings me a lot of joy. This year, it needed some extra TLC because I had neglected it during the winter. I’ve been spending a lot of time out side working, cleaning up, planting and tending. Being outside with my hands in the dirt has been the best thing for me.

10.) Time Outs. For Me. Going to my room, once a day, and shutting the door. This is a sanity saver.

There you have it? What have been your Quarantine Lifesavers???

Faith, Fear and Filtering the Noise

As I sat and read a book last night at 5:30 pm (which never happened in my Pre-Corona life), The Hubs came home from work and we chatted about our days.

Though nothing really different is happening during my day to day, I feel like I’m finally set into a routine. It’s my Shelter-in-Place routine and it’s helping. I think. Even though the routine is pretty much the same EVERY DAY, I don’t spend my days trying to figure out what I should be doing.

In my Pre-Corona life, we’d probably be rushing off to baseball practice and I’d be trying to figure out dinner. Now, we aren’t rushing anywhere and so dinner can wait while I finish chapter 2.

I literally spent the first two weeks of this Lock Down in FEAR. Real fear. I honestly didn’t think I would die if I contracted it. I did fear for others that I loved. It was utter confusion and every day something else got locked down or cancelled. Every day the walls around our life shrank in around us. I spent my days on Facebook and my nights wide awake.

Oh Facebook. I’m coming back around to you.

Though it didn’t completely go away, the fear started to subside. Then came the venturing out into the world to shop. Some people wore gloves and masks. Everyone started to disinfect their groceries. And I kept wondering when I was going to wake up? Zoom Calls replaced baseball practice. No one can find toilet paper. And what day is it again?

Where do you go when you are so disconnected? You go to places where you can connect like Facebook, Instagram and Zoom Calls.

Oh Facebook. Everyone thinks they are the expert.

Then came the sad and sobering realization that things are not going back to normal any time soon or ever? That thought gave me the greatest fear.

Now before I go on, I have to say that these past 5 weeks of Quarantine have made me realize there are things I do not miss and do not plan on going back to. I don’t want things to go back to exactly how they were but I miss the library big time. I want to hug my dad. I want to go to the beach. I want to go back to church.

We’ve realized, if we haven’t already, that main stream media is extremely biased and honestly not trustworthy news. Where do you get the facts and not the hype?

The arguments swirled around me every time I hopped on the internet, especially Facebook. You see posts from people urging everyone to just stay home; the virus is everywhere. Meanwhile there are loud voices demanding we open up, we get back to business, the government is trying to control us.

Fear. Fear. Fear. Fear. Fear.

The truth for me was that I was going to the wrong place to get my answers and my assurances. I want to know how this all ends. I was going to people instead of God.

This post isn’t about what I think about our government and who I agree or disagree with. Honestly, I’m somewhere in the middle. That doesn’t matter, though. What matters is where I place my fear and worry and whether I let it control me or not.

Do I stick my head in the sand and just ignore what is going on? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I believe we should do our research to the best of our ability and know what’s going on in our world, our government, and our community. How do you ignore what’s going on right now? It’s impossible and foolish to do so.

I had to filter. I had to filter what I listened to and how often I listened to it. There was too much noise. Too many voices trying to be heard.

I needed to practice Faith Over Fear. Me looking to information and concrete answers (which there are none at this point) was me needing to be in control. I needed to ask, how would Jesus have me respond? And I just couldn’t focus my mind and heart with all the noise, with everyone’s opinions, and with all the Facebook posts that people post. Guess what? People, for the most part, are going to post things that support what they already believe. So when you aren’t sure what to think, this is dangerous ground.

This is what I’ve done this past week. If it helps just one person or you can take one thing away from this blog post, I’m happy.

1.) I’m limiting my time on Facebook and I’m about to take a complete break.

Lily and I are doing these Facebook Lives every Thursday. We are doing DIYs and it’s been really fun. Other than that, I’m trying to stay off Facebook. If I post, I post something encouraging. Facebook was giving me anxiety as I would get lost down the rabbit hole of reading posts. I took Facebook off my phone as well. Once, we are done doing our LIVES in April a good clean break might be in order.

2.) If you constantly post politically posts, I snooze you.

Sorry, friends. That’s the way it has to be.

3.) I’m trying to focus on just a few places where I feel I can get reliable news.

This is very hard to find; but resources are out there. I need to know what’s going on and I’m totally okay with differing opinions. I just want the facts and not the drama. Don’t try to get me riled up. I’m already riled up!!!

I have a friend who I follow on Instagram. I know her heart and she’s a wealth of knowledge. She has a holistic approach to health and I appreciate the knowledge she shares. I don’t feel scared when I read her posts. I feel empowered.

4.) I’m just digging in the Bible and reading things that bolster my faith.

God has reminded me that I need to think back on all the ways God has been faithful in my life. He never changes. So I don’t need to worry or question His faithfulness now. Whatever he does is for our good and His greatest glory.

I’m reading Because He Loves Me by Elyse Fitzpatrick, the New Testament, and watching the The Chosen series. All three of these things have been encouraging me to seek God and have been reminding me of the great love He has for me.

5.) I’ve been gardening and it’s saving me.

Except for the happy sounds of my kiddos, my garden is quiet and peaceful. Being outside with my puppy Mac next to me and my hands in the dirt has been therapeutic!!! Gardening is a lot of tending and waiting. It requires patience and diligence before you get to any blooms and harvest. This has not been lost on me during this time of waiting.

6.) Stay connected.

I’m honestly so over Zoom calls. We need them, though. Our kids need to see their friends. I need to stay connected to my family and friends. Seeing H Lego Zoom with his friends is adorable. Lily is missing her friends greatly. Zoom is helping.

Our weekly on-line church with Pastor Josh, our weekly Fellowship Group Zoom and Youthgroup Zooms are the most important parts of our week. We need to stay connected!

7.) Memes

Okay this is silly; but Memes are my favorite right now. They are meaningful, deep, and ridiculous all at the same time and I absolutely love them.

8.) Serve Others

There has never been a better time to serve others than now. We can do it from 6 feet apart, too.

Do you need to filter out the noise? Maybe it’s not Facebook. Maybe it’s another area. Our minds weren’t meant to be overloaded with information. Our hearts weren’t meant to be in a constant state of fear and worry. Since I’ve limited my time on Social Media, especially Facebook, I’ve been much, much happier.

Isaiah 26:3

You will keep in perfect peace

those whose minds are steadfast,

because they trust you.

He promises to give us wisdom if we ask. Do we believe it? Yes, we need to decide what we believe and where we stand. Are we okay with not having all the answers, right now? Are we content in the waiting?

Psalm 16:8

I will keep my

eyes always on

the Lord.