We took the kids on a walk the other night and we ended up in our old neighborhood, the one Andy and I lived in when we first got married.

Funny story. When we first got married, we rented the two bedroom condo Andy had lived in with some friends before we got engaged. A couple of years later, we bought the condo directly across the parking lot from our current condo. Moving day was easy and kind of comical as we watched all our friends carry boxes just a few yards away. It was the first home we owned. It was actually much nicer on the inside than our previous condo, with upgrades and air conditioning. (And we’ve never had AC since.) It was at this point we were able to get our first dog, Jackson.

As we strolled past our old stomping grounds almost 18 years later (We lived there a total of 4 years.), we reflected on how much life had changed. We were newlyweds in those condos. We were figuring out each other and our life as a married couple. We were kidless and had so many free Saturdays.

Let’s just take a moment of silence for the quiet Saturdays I’m never getting back………………..

18 years, 2 kids, and 3 dogs later, life is definitely busier and more complicated; but wow, is it sweet. We’ve filled these last (almost) 18 years with amazing memories. And they all started in our little condo.

I couldn’t help but notice how small our condo seemed as we walked past it. And yes, it was quite small.

We don’t live in a big house now, by any means; but we’ve come a long way since our first abode. Sometimes, when we need to get perspective, it’s good to look at where we’ve been and compare that to where we are now.

Sometimes, I compare myself to people around me. Really, that’s quiet unfair to myself. I’m on my own path and my growth chart. My passions and goals aren’t going to be same as the person next to me. Our family has it’s own course of action and our own path. God’s plan for my husband, my kids and for me, is ours and ours alone.

Our son, Henry, was born 10 weeks early and weighed 3 pounds, 10 oz. He’s never been on a “normal” growth chart. I’m not sure where he’d fall on a regular growth chart now at almost 7; but for several years our wonderful pediatrician didn’t even mark his growth on one. Rather, she gave him his own chart and showed us that he was progressing and growing; without comparing him to other boys his age. When we did compare he didn’t even make in on the chart. He’s still the smaller (and often the smallest) one when I see him next to boys his age; but all I see is a healthy kid, a healthy, happy, energetic, whole kid. And that’s all that matters.

I can look back and see growth and I can look ahead and get excited for the future; but looking to either side of me and sinking in the trap of comparison is pointless, even harmful. The here and now is far from perfect and most definitely not easy; but there is so much good in my present and hope in the future. Casting my eyes to the side and comparing myself to people who have a different path, different relationships, different family dynamics, different financial statuses, different personalities, different strengths, different weaknesses, and different passions just keeps me from enjoying my right now. It also keeps me from reaching the future goals God has for me and for my family.

I don’t have this whole mindset perfected. No, not at all. But God’s been teaching me a lot about a right perspective.

When we look to the left and the right, let’s do it encourage and to lend that skate; but not to compare. Perspective is a funny thing because it depends on which angle you choose to take, the negative or positive. We are all better off than someone and there is always someone who is more successful than we are. But if we look at in this way: That compared to how we started in the world, helpless and with nothing; we are all doing better than we deserve!

I’m thanking God for what he’s  given me today:salvation, joy and purpose. How about you.